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I have/had an e90 335i, e60 M5, a cayenne s, and x5. I feel I am qualified to help.
The e60 definitely fits stuff better, and the back seat is significantly larger and more usable then the e90. It definitely has a hole in the gas tank, my best tank ever was 18.2mpg, and it happened once, mostly going down hill. My avg over 9,5xx miles was 14.01mpg. It also consumes a fair amount of oil for a modern car. Still it is a great car, and lots of fun on the highway. Smg is a little irritating in traffic and around town. I got rid of it when the warranty ran out, and because I wasn't driving it much due to work reasons.
The cayenne is pretty small for kids and the stuff that comes with them. It is the most fun you can have in an suv on the road, but it is still not fun enough to be your 'fun car' I tried that, it worked for a year then I got a fun car too. I really loved my cayenne, maybe it was the right car at the right time for me (before kid, snow boarding and wake boarding heavily).
The x5 is the wife's dd, and it is a great kid hauler, we got the diesel, so fuel economy is very good for a vehicle of it's size. The cayenne is built better then the x5, and it is more fun to drive then the x5.
I am confidant that I can put more stuff in the e60 then I can put in the x5, due to the shape of the cargo area.
Since you already have an suv I wouldn't buy another one. The m5 is a great car, but it will cost more then the average car to keep it on the road. It is a very nice place to spend time, and it hauls ass when you want it to. If you spend lots of time I town or in traffic....it can get irritating, and I always wondered about clutch life and all the voodoo going on in there.
In your situation I would have, and did buy an m5. A sensible person, who intended to put a bunch of miles on the car, would look into an e60 550i with the sport pack, or a new 535i.
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